Jeremy Felt

Dear Abby

On one side we have “Don’t Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood” and on the other side we have “MAN IS A MENACE WHEN DRIVING WHEELCHAIR WHILE INTOXICATED“.

Of course, while that scenario is pretty sad/amusing, the following takes the cake:

DEAR ABBY: Before a game, my friend asked if I ever had a flame-shooter. Then he went into the bathroom and got a can of hair spray and some matches. He told me to light the match and hold it. While I was holding the match, he sprayed the hair spray on it, and then my hand caught fire. I wasn’t burned, but it scared me.

I’m not sure what to do. I want him to still be my friend, but I don’t want him to get hurt. Should I let him keep doing it, or should I tell someone and have them tell him to stop? — WORRIED IN KANSAS

I will answer that question with a direct quote from another movie:

Mama says, stupid is as stupid does.

Seriously, did Abby really need to respond? And really, should I be reading Dear Abby?

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