Jeremy Felt

A Monkey Would be Funnier

“I made it very plain, we will not have an all volunteer army……”

What was that? Oh, our Pres. is talking… Wait, what did he say? Hold on, he just got corrected:

“We will have an all volunteer army!”

And they say Kerry flip-flops. If you haven’t caught this magical campaign moment, check out iFilm’s clip with Jon Stewart commentary.


Of course, there always is a real possibility of the draft being reinstated. If another catastrophic event were to occur, and we were forced to invade another country (see 2006’s war with Syria and Iran) that was threating to destroy our freedom, we may need to call on our proud pawns to help us overcome the evil baby-killers.

Did I saw pawns? Sorry, citizens. Anyhow, to prepare yourself for this experience, the people over at have put together a morale booster.

disclaimer: Bush’s daughters are displayed for promotional purposes only. They will be spending their “Operation Nuclear Freedom” time on a Texas airbase, defending our soil from Iran’s invading troops on the Mexican border.

post disclaimer: That was not a dig at anybody currently stationed in the Texas National Guard or any other unit of the armed services. It was a dig at the aristocratic pecking order bound to exist in a draft situation.